If you asked a random person to describe what a Christian man should be like, most would probably start listing qualities like tenderness, "niceness'', tolerance, gentleness and meekness. The “ideal Christian man” in the minds of many —both within and outside of the faith—, is a man who never speaks loudly. He’s a man who never sets any boundaries. He’s a man who “loves” and “accepts” everyone and everything, no matter how degenerate.
Ask a random person to describe a Christian man and they’ll end up describing Ned Flanders. Not even the jacked, handyman version of Ned Flanders, but Ned Flanders at his nerdiest, at his absolute weakest, as the epitome of a doormat.
And honestly, could you blame them?
Look inside most Christian churches today and be very honest about what you see. Do you see men who inspire you? Men of character and fortitude? Men of discipline and willpower?
Chances are, those you see at mass every Sunday perfectly resemble this version of Ned Flanders. If Ned Flanders has become the stereotype for a Christian man, we need to take a hard look at ourselves to understand if we might be perpetuating this stereotype.
Stereotypes and generalizations, after all, don’t appear out of thin air.
Where Did It Go Wrong?
I believe the problem arises from a very fundamental misunderstanding of our faith. The central figure, the most important aspect of Christianity is, obviously, Jesus Christ. Everything we do and everything we try to be stems from who we believe Jesus to be.
Herein lies the problem: the Jesus we are being shown is not the Jesus of the Gospels, not the true, perfectly masculine, perfectly balanced Jesus, but a limpwristed, hippie pacifist who never dared offend anyone.
Everything stems from a lack of knowledge of the true Jesus, the Jesus who called out evil and corruption, the outlaw Jesus who walked across all of Palestine preaching truth and virtue at a time where degeneracy and evil reigned supreme. Most Christian men sadly haven’t truly put in the time to learn about the historical Jesus, who is anything but a hippie pacifist.
(Video from my Instagram, which I made after seeing this repost
from
It’s not entirely their fault though. I think there’s also an intentional effort by the enemy to twist the mainstream image of Christ, to make it easier for evil to infiltrate our churches, communities, and families. If we believe we are called to be pushovers and avoid confronting evil and sin, how much easier will it be for the enemy to propagate, corrupt our sons and daughters, and spread darkness across the world?
The heart of the matter is that Christian men are called to imitate Christ. Who we believe Christ to be is who we will end up trying to emulate. It all comes down to studying the historical Jesus, of getting to know who He was, how He acted, and what virtues He lived by. If we do this, we’ll surely find that He was tender and gentle, yes, but also incredibly courageous, fearless, capable and willing of showing righteous anger, of confronting evil and speaking out boldly against sin.
Be imitators of me, as I am of Christ.
— 1 Corinthians 11:1
Sadly, most of us have focused on imitating just His tender, kind side, and not enough his courageous, bold, fearlessly masculine side.
As a side note, I noticed this as I recovered my faith some years ago, and wrote a book to try and help men know the masculine Jesus of the gospels, so they could better imitate Him as a man of virtuous strength, and fight against the watered down versions of Christianity that have become the norm. If you’re interested in reading it, you can check it out here.
The point of the book —and of this article—, is that we need to be intentional about changing the Christian stereotype. We are not called to be Ned Flanders. We’re called to be like Christ, like the Apostle Paul, and like many of the other hundreds of strong and courageous masculine saints that showed uncommon discipline, self-denial, and sacrifice.
To the angel of the church in Laodicea, write this:
The Amen, the faithful and true witness, the source of God’s creation, says this: “I know your works; I know that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either cold or hot. So, because you are lukewarm, neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of my mouth.”
— Revelation 3:14-16
It’s no coincidence that there are more angry men who’ve become saints than there are cowardly saints passing as pacifists.
Societal change begins with us, men, stepping up and fulfilling our true role here on earth. There’s no more hiding behind lies and false representations of our Savior. There’s no more making excuses for our cowardice. We can continue down the path we’ve been on, and watch from the sidelines as the world descends into all-consuming madness, or we can take it upon ourselves to be the leaders our God and our world need, to pick up our cross unto our broad and strong shoulders, and crawl out of this pit of darkness into the light that is calling for us.
Thank you for reading!
If you enjoyed this post and could leave a like or comment it would be greatly appreciated, as it will help my work reach more people
If you liked this article, you’ll love my books.

The move that clip is from is called “A Man Called Peter” about Peter Marshall a Scottish preacher who immigrated to the U.S. and was eventually appointed Chaplain to the U.S. Senate. The film was actually nominated for an Academy Award in the 1950s. You can find a number of similar nuggets of wisdom throughout the film. Worth a watch if you can find it on Amazon still.
I really loved reading this, and I agree with you. I've been talking about this for a while, too. I'm glad to see that I'm not the only one seeing a problem with how we evangelize the Gospel, and Jesus Christ.